*Reposted from my original blog: Ashley Jo Bruce
Listen to my recent podcast that expands on this topic here!
Can I tell you a secret?
I am 21 and I have never been on a date! ???
If we are being completely honest I know I don’t fall into the ‘average’ category but its never bothered me. I’ve been more focused on my friends and community then on pursuing someone. As an introvert (yes I can be alone for days & 100% content) with BIG DREAMS I’ve always felt like I wanted to wait to get married until after I accomplish some things on my own.
My friends call it stubbornness, I call it independence.
But this doesn’t mean that I don’t have my days of wanting a relationship. I want someone to text me, pick me up from the airport, check up on me, bring me my favorite food on my bad days, take me on creative dates & do life with me.
We were built for community! Our beautiful God created us for one another so it’s within our making to desire this deep love and connection.
It’s my heart’s desire so I decided to use that longing & hope in a creative way.
>>> You might like this too: How to Find Purpose in Your Single Years
I started writing letters & prayers to my future husband.
But mine don’t look like the filled shoe box under my bed. I actually use Evernote. A folder called Dear Future Husband. I type mine & I put dates on them.
One day I am doing to print them off and bind them as a beautiful gift on our wedding day but right now this place is safe.
I just open a new window & type. I tell my struggles, passions, day’s events, favorite foods… I just unload. It will be a way for him in the future to glimpse my past. To see my heart before we ever met. To hear about how God’s been working and orchestrating all this time.
One day it will be a beautiful collection,
until then it’s a messy file folder.
Grab the free printable list of 50 prayer & journaling prompts here!
I AM NOT SAYING THIS IS FOR YOU.
But if you want to try using this creative outlet to pour out your heart in a healthy way here is some easy steps to get you started!
1. THIS IS NO PLACE FOR PERFECTION.
It’s not about the right words, the romantic thoughts, the perfect love letter. It’s about your true life. It’s about what’s really happening, how you really feel & how excited you are that all of this is building you into a better person for him. It’s raw emotion into a true representation of who you are. Don’t overthink it.
2. SPEAK LIKE YOU WOULD TO YOUR BEST FRIEND!
Keep it intimate. This person that you are writing to will know you better than ANY other human! They will already know about your imperfections and your little quirks. Just write like you would to someone you know deeply.
3. CHOOSE YOUR METHOD.
Handwriting letters? Typing more your style? I give you permission to buy a new notebook at Target! ?Just choose one place for these letters to be collected. A box under the bed, a file in Evernote or the notebook!
4. JUST WRITE
Need some ideas of what to write to get you started? Here are 20 prompts!
- What happened today?
- What God is teaching you.
- Why you wish He was already in your life.
- Why you are grateful God’s timing is perfect.
- Fun quirks about yourself.
- What season of life you are in.
- What’s your favorite tv show/movie and why?
- What’s your biggest dream?
- How do you want to grow to become more like Jesus?
- Your favorite childhood memory.
- What couple do you admire most and why?
- Your biggest current struggle.
- Why you have hope.
- What your strengths & Weaknesses are.
- What your love language is.
- What you really want your future husband to know about your current self.
- How you are intentionally preparing yourself for marriage.
- Your dreams about your wedding day.
- Your thoughts on God’s creation of marriage.
- Why you are content waiting for Him.
5. SPEAK TO GOD ABOUT HIM
I don’t know how you feel about the word prayer but I know it can pull around some negative baggage. So let’s not look at it as this awkward one-sided conversation where we talk to this far away God about problems.
Let’s just meet Him for coffee. Share your heart. Ask questions. Sit in silence while listening. Then ask Him to strengthen your future hubby. Ask Him to mold Him into the leader you will need. Ask Him to remind Him how much He is loved.
There are two different methods I use to pray for my future husband. One is specific topics I just want to talk to God about on His behalf and the other is praying Scripture.
Here are 15 Prayer prompts!
- For Him to be gifted with Godly friends & mentors.
- For Him to find joy in His work, as we were created originally for.
- For Him to embrace the hard situations as a chance to grow!
- For Him to realize He can’t do life without God & people.
- For the cultivating of wisdom.
- For Him to deeper understand how He is loved.
- For Him to learn the difference between being in the world & of the world.
- For Him to stay strong in the fight against our enemy!
- For Him to be a BIG dreamer.
- For Him to realize failure doesn’t exist, life lessons are everywhere.
- For Him to realize the need for forgiveness, for Himself & for others.
- For His pride to be shaken.
- For Him to find the fun in experiencing everyday life with God!
- For His heart to be molded to be more like Jesus.
- For Him to choose courage in the face of fear.
Now 15 Bible Verses to pray over him!
- Proverbs 13:20
- 1 Corinthians 10:13
- 2 Peter 3:18
- Deuteronomy 31:6
- Mark 11:24
- Psalms 37:4
- Ephesians 5:1-2
- James 1:22
- John 8:12
- James 3:13-17
- Ephesians 6:13
- Proverbs 28:27
- Romans 8:28
- 2 Peter 3:18
- Proverbs 4:23
I DON’T recommend using these all in one letter, or day but if this is something you are interested in doing consistently, I made a printable + check boxes with these prompts so you can see what you’ve done & other prompts to use!